Magical Mystery TourAlong!

There's nothing quite as magical as Portugal's lush tropical island of Madeira, or as mysteriously magnificent as Switzerland's Lauterbrunnen valley. Three weeks exploring these two unique versions of paradise is exactly what we need ...

Let's GO!

Oh! NO!

It turns out there are some things you just can't predict. Like the bottom of the stock market, or what a very stable genius might tweet in the middle of the night, or when the next pandemic will sweep over the world.

Like everyone, we hoped the outbreak of a new virus would be kept in check. By early March, the world was beginning to shut down. The inevitable decision was made for us when Portugal established a 14-day mandatory quarantine for anyone entering the country.

Madeira and Switzerland would have to wait.

It sucks to cancel an adventure that's so close you can taste it. But that pales in comparison to millions of people becoming seriously ill, suddenly unemployed, or worse. So suck it up, buttercup! Europe will still be there when this epoch is finally in the past. 

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In this edition, we'll do a brief flyby of Madeira and the Lauterbrunnen Valley, and then we'll take a deep dive into big numbers. That's right, big numbers!

So come along on this Magical Mystery TourAlong ... won't you?

Grab a cup of your favorite beverage, maintain a distance of at least six feet from your screen, and wrap your breathing holes in a protective mask!



Let's GOOOO!!!!

(Don't forget to click the links! They're a BIG part of this TourAlong!)

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Our Hike!

The Pico do Arieiro - Pico Ruivo trek was going to be the highlight of our stay on Madeira. Or maybe it would have been the food. Or maybe "glamping" in a yurt perched on a seaside cliff!

The Marco Polo travel guide to Madeira is a great source of information, but by far our favorite source is the Stay Classy VLOG series by Amalie and Joen. Originally from Denmark, this couple has a super fun way of presenting Madeira and all of Portugal. I invite you to take our hike from the comfort of your quarantined La-Z-Boy Recliner! Here's the episode: The Jurassic Park of Europe.

Or, watch Exploring FUNCHAL of MADEIRA (an endlessly charming city) for an entertaining introduction to Funchal, Madeira's main city.

It's way too easy to go down a deep rabbit hole with Amalie and Joen's seemingly endless series of travel videos!

(And seriously, the photo above is on the Pico do Arieiro - Pico Ruivo hike!)
(Image credit: https://wall.alphacoders.com/big.php?i=747966)

Oh Lauterbrunnen! How I Yodel for Thee!

The quintessential Swiss valley of Lauterbrunnen has become our spot in the Alps. It has everything: clifftop villages, glaciated mountains, verdant valley floors, and cows that produce fresh warm chocolate milk and creamy fondue cheese every morning! You didn't know that about Swiss cows, now did you!

Better still! In Switzerland, all the the women wear dirndls and all the men wear lederhosen!

And did you know all Swiss babies are born yodeling. They ARE!

"Yodel lay hee yodel lay hee yodel lay hee hooooo!" 

"Riiiiii...colaaaaaa!" 

Heidi and Hans

Heidi and Hans are proof that all Swiss are young and good looking!

Like all Swiss women, Heidi gathers fresh warm chocolate milk and creamy fondue cheese from cows every morning. Her hobbies? Serving steins* of beer to thirsty travelers and making chocolate!

And Hans? Hans works in a bank where he hides stacks of cash rich people give him. His hobbies? Making watches and pocket knives!

Heidi and Hans let people like us visit their country because they can't help being polite and they like our money.

Yodel lay hee hooooo!

*Did you know the word stein is an English term for a beer mug and is not used in German speaking regions? I just learned this!

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But enough of boring travel dreams ...

Let's take a TourAlongDeTour and get into playing with numbers!

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Nothing Says 'Pandemic' Than a Mad Run on Toilet Paper!

Yep! We are smart people. After all, if you're going to be hunkered down for a month or so, you'd better have enough loo rolls to keep your bum hygienic, right?

How many do you need? 10, 20, 40, 800?

Well, it turns out there's an app for that!

Next time rumors of the world's demise pop up, let's all agree to consult the Use Calculator as a sanitation supply sanity check.

And guess what? According to the article from which I borrowed the image above, not only is toilet paper a giant waste of resources, but Americans use the most! Yes! We're #1 AGAIN!

We smeared the crap out of all other countries! U.S.A.!

But watch out ... Germany is nipping at our butts. Let's not let them wipe us off the top of the toilet paper pedestal!

Extra! Extra! Read all about it! Here's an update for you from Atlas Obscura: 

A Brief History of TP!

Have You Received Your COVID-19 Stimulus Money Yet? 

You know, your share of the TWO TRILLION dollars we decided to print? So, what IS two trillion dollars? What if you spent that amount, spread out evenly, over the course of your lifetime?

It turns out that there are 700,800 hours in a lifespan of 80 years. This means you'd have to spend $2,853,881 per hour ... or $47,564 per minute your ENTIRE LIFE!

To put it in visual perspective, our friends at Gizmodo have produced a handy graphic to get an idea of what 1 trillion dollars looks like. So look at their graphic and multiply it by two!

That stack of cash is really hard to imagine.


P.S., I hope we all live more than 80 years. So, let's go with 100 years! In that case, there are 876,000 hours in a lifetime. You'd have to spend just $2,283,105 per hour, or $38,052 per minute! Whew! What a relief! That's much more doable.

And Then There's Saturn's Rings!

The current thinking is that a moon 250 miles in diameter strayed a wee bit too close to the gas giant. Saturn's gravity pulled the moon apart, casting its 17 QUADRILLION TONS of (mostly) water ice into the rings we see today.

• Saturn's Rings Fun Fact #1 - While the rings are 170,000 miles across they are typically just 30 feet thick!

• Saturn's Rings Fun Fact #2 - The Cassini space craft discovered that the rings also feature ice towers as high as 1.6 miles!

Crazy stuff, that solar system of ours!

I invite you to take your own PlanetTourAlong via the five part series on NOVA!

But Now, Let's Get Small...

Small?

Very minuscule, tiny small things are what drives the device you're using to read this TourAlong. In the world of digital devices, small is measured in nanometers—or billionths of a meter.

The image above isn't dental work. It's a scanning electron microscope's image of computer chip transistors, or "switches." Each "tower" is just 5 nanometers across. A single computer chip sporting these bad boys packs 30 BILLION switches in an area the size of your fingernail! And THAT'S why your "mobile phone" is really a remarkably powerful computer! A remarkably powerful computer that we use for a myriad of silly things.

So how can we relate to a nanometer?

Grab a piece of paper to ponder and LET'S GO!

A typical piece of paper is .0039 inches thick. So, a stack of 10,000 pieces of paper is 39 inches high ... roughly one meter, or one billion nanometers. Divide one billion by 10,000 and you're left with 100,000. A piece of paper is 100,000 nanometers thick! Visualize this: If a nanometer was equal to an inch, that piece of paper would be 1.58 miles high!

Now, think about a single computer chip transistor that's just 5 nanometers across and compare it to the 100,000 nanometer thickness of a piece of paper.

Turns out ... it's kind of hard to relate to a nanometer!

Smaller? 

Well, how about a 2.5 nanometer transistor? This technology is truly at the atomic scale, with atomic manufacturing techniques at work. After all, the size of atoms range from 0.1 - 0.5 nanometers! Or ... how about just making transistors that ARE single atoms!

Do You Want to Get REALLY Small? ...

And Now, It's Plank Time!

No! Not that kind of plank time, but Planck Time!

Scientists studying the birth of the Universe—what happened during the very first second of the Big Bang—use a unit of time to help them break that first second into small "slices" for study. That unit of time is Planck Time ... and don't forget its cousin, Planck Length!

It turns out A LOT happened in that first second of time. I don't pretend to understand things like superstring theory or quantum effects on space-time, but what I can plagiarize is that Planck measurements were created to study gravity at the quantum level.

What is Planck time? What is Planck length?

The PhysLink website explains these this way:

Planck time is the time it would take a photon traveling at the speed of light to cross a distance equal to the Planck length. This is the 'quantum of time', the smallest measurement of time that has any meaning, and is equal to 10-43 seconds. No smaller division of time has any meaning. Within the framework of the laws of physics as we understand them today, we can say only that the universe came into existence when it already had an age of 10-43 seconds.

Planck length is the scale at which classical ideas about gravity and space-time cease to be valid, and quantum effects dominate. This is the 'quantum of length', the smallest measurement of length with any meaning. And roughly equal to 1.6 x10-35m or about 10-20 times the size of a proton.

So Just How Small is a Slice of Planck time?

And the answer is? ...

It's EXTRAORDINARILY SMALL!!-43

GET THIS: There are more slices of Planck Time in ONE second than there have been seconds since the Big Bang happened almost 14 billion years ago!

Let's wrap this up: Remember our Nanometer? You know, one billionth of a meter? Well consider that a proton's size is one MILLIONTH of a nanometer, and a Planck Length is 10-20 times the size of a proton (or 10 QUINTRILLION times smaller than a proton). Yikes! That's a pretty tiny distance!

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There You Go!

And after all that, I'm hungry!

I think I'll grab a big ol' slice of that Planck Time pie, pour a hot Cup-o-Swiss-Cow Chocolate Milk, and add a plate of Madeira on the side!

Until next time ... dream about travel ... and think big ... and think small!

Ciao! ~ Todd

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Like the TourAlongWithTodd blog and want to keep up to date? Here are three easy options!

• Email me at todd@toddchavez.com and I’ll add you to my distribution list or…
• Enter your email address in the Follow by Email box on the right at the top of this page and follow the simple verification process. This method delivers the blog directly to your inbox.
• If you have a Blogger account, add my blog to your Blogger Reading List

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Death Cab Do-Over!

Loyal readers may recall last September's post in which Natalie, Simon, and I were lightninged out of a Death Cab for Cutie concert. An unusually powerful storm pummeled the Seattle area that night. We concluded, logically, that the bolts of fire raining down from the heavens were thrown by Thor himself because, being an old god, he hates loud rock-n-roll music. It's a bit ironic, don't you think? The guy who delivers deafening cracks of thunder is annoyed by awesome music. He must be a cranky god.

A week later, the band announced three back-to-back February 2020 shows at Seattle's historic Showbox at Pike Place Market. In Death Cab style, tickets were offered first to showgoers of the concert interrupted by Thor.

That's the recap!

Now, pop open a bottle of ice-cold Rainier Beer because it's time for a Death Cab do-over!

And to ensure your readability fun, this trip review is being delivered via the ever-popular picture-n-caption format.

Let's begin, shall we?

Our approach to Seattle featured views of the Cascade's volcanoes from Mt. Rainier to central Oregon's Sisters. Pictured here is detail of Rainier's east slope. Did you know Mt. Rainier last erupted in 1894? It did!

Oh, how I long for the good old days when women were systematically objectified ... such as stewardesses! What's wrong with miniskirts, go-go boots, and little blue caps? That's just commonsense attire! At least mannequins have not suffered the same fate.

The Link light-rail and the No. 44 bus was a super-efficient way to move from SEA-TAC to our destination in Seattle's Ballard area. Cost per person? $5.75! Pictured here is the Old Rainier Brewery from the light-rail. Did you know Rainier Beer is currently brewed in California? CALIFORNIA? And did you know Rainier Beer was a sponsor of the 1963 American expedition to Mt. Everest? It was! ... along with the American Tobacco Company ... the WHAT?

Well whaddayaknow! It's Jim Whittaker sporting a refreshing can of Rainier Beer! In 1963, Jim became the first American to summit Mt. Everest. I think we can all agree, there's nothing like an ice-cold beer at 29,029 feet in gale-force winds, grueling subzero temperatures, and air containing just 30% of the oxygen you'd have at sea level.

Speaking of oxygen, the American Tobacco Company donated 6,000 cigarettes to the expedition, but the climbers thought they were getting 60,000. Either way, that's a lot of butts and an odd high-altitude breathtaking adventure! Yes, every inch a real smoke ... and comfortably smooth too! Those in the know ... go for Camel.

Our concert evening began with a walk from Simon's Capitol Hill apartment to city center. The Seattle Times says Capitol Hill is "Pretty much Seattle's capital of everything cool." I'm not sure my Ballard-based brother would agree, but Cap Hill does have cool street art here and there. So take THAT, Ballard!

Seattle is known as an unconventional city with its caffeine-charged coffee and craft beer culture; it's also an epicenter of all things tech-y and airplane-y. But less known is its pioneering use of promotional posters as utility poles!

Completed in 1977, the 514-foot Rainier Tower -- referred to by locals as the "Beaver Building" or alternately the "Golf Tee Building" because of its unusual concrete pedestal -- has a new neighbor! Nearly completed, and topping out at 850 feet, the new Rainier Square Tower is Rainier Tower's new best friend, though it seems like the naming committee phoned this one in.

Pre-concert Getting your Brit on! at Elephant & Castle. The E&C serves authentic English pub grub, shows football matches on the big screen, and has a proper "billiard room with darts" ... which is an odd twist on billiards, but the Brits do things like that, like voting themselves out of the EU. I'm glad we've never been THAT crazy.

Pike Place Market is always a favorite, especially at sunset, and it turned out the concert venue -- The Showbox -- was just around the corner from this fish-flinging tourist stop. The market was established in 1907 and its signature neon sign and clock were added in 1937. But did you know a startup coffee company opened its first store at the Market in 1971? Yes! Starbucks did! But they didn't sell brewed coffee at the time, just the roasted beans. And it's still there, along with 450 other Starbucks stores located within 300 feet.

Nearly everyone who's anyone has played the Showbox. Founded in 1939, the venue has hosted musicians from Duke Ellington to The Ramones to Katy Perry. And then there was the infamous three-night engagement of Boise's own alt-rock fame band Built To Spill in 2003. Did you know that another Boise band -- Draw -- was the opening band for BTS? It WAS! And do you know who the drummer for Draw was? Yep! That would be me. Someday MY name will be on that mirror too ... as soon as I etch it in with a pocket knife!  

Our view from sit-down seats (a real premium at the Showbox) was ideal, and Death Cab's performance was phenomenal. Perfect sound and their no-nonsense approach to delivering really great music made this do-over trip well worth it.

You may think that this is a doctored photo, or even a mistake. But you'd be wrong. This is actual undiscovered photographic evidence that minds are blown away by Death Cab for Cutie's music. Cutie concert goers eventually recover, but their lives are never quite the same ... they hum and smile incessantly.

Yeah, there's one aspect of Seattle (and too many other cities) that sucks -- people without places to call home.

After the show we wandered into a quiet pub at Pike Place Market for a post-concert drink and snack. Just across the street was Showgirls! I'm not sure No Experience Necessary! delivers the right message, do you? Other titillating tidbits flashing on the screen included Sexperts on Duty!, VP Rooms Available!, and Amateur Night Every Thursday! Now that's good clean fun for the entire family! No experience necessary!

QUESTION: What travel blog post is complete without a plane's wing and clouds?

ANSWER: No travel blog post ever!

Still, the point during ascent and descent when flying through the puffy clouds is always a bonus.

Another bonus of flight, if you take the time, is observing and determining where you are at any given point. This was an easy one because the route was familiar ... looking north into the Snake River canyon near Huntington, Oregon. Further north and just out of frame, Hells Canyon, North America's deepest river gorge at 7,993 feet from top to bottom! 

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And so it was ... 

A do-over concert that delivered the goods. If you're wondering about sampling Death Cab for Cutie, I recommend their most recent album, Thank You For Today; it's why the word awesome was created. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure even Thor would like it. He'd like it so much that he'd go crazy throwing bolts of fire to and fro ... and ... nope ... on second thought, don't tell Thor about the album.

Stay tuned for more from touralongwithtodd...

Until then... Ciao!

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Like the TourAlongWithTodd blog and want to keep up to date? Here are three easy options!

• Email me at todd@toddchavez.com and I’ll add you to my distribution list or…
• Enter your email address in the Follow by Email box on the right at the top of this page and follow the simple verification process. This method delivers the blog directly to your inbox.
• If you have a Blogger account, add my blog to your Blogger Reading List

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An Electrifying 30 Hours!

Ah, Seattle in September...

Crystal blue skies accented by the Puget Sound's cool breeze. It's a perfect time to visit the Emerald City! And this trip, by design, was a 30-hour door-to-door adventure to see Simon and Death Cab for Cutie.

Just to clarify, seeing Simon and Death Cab for Cutie were not mutually inclusive. Simon is our son; Death Cab for Cutie is a long-popular Indie Rock band. We like them both and thought we'd combine the two events into one fun TourAlong!

Yep! We are smart shoppers!

So grab a cup of the beverage that reminds you most of Seattle and join in on the fun!

And off we go!

Have you ever stayed up way too late the night before an early morning flight? You know, just double-checking preparations? I have...

After five hours of sleep, Natalie and I arrived at the Boise airport and learned that we'd been preapproved for TSA's PRE check-in! Awesome! We didn't have to disrobe! Whew! Besides, it's no fun making other people feel so bad about their bodies.

And off we go!

Whoa partner!... not so fast.....

As we taxied to the runway, our plane made an odd turn and stopped... "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain. Because of traffic at SEA-TAC, we're going to hold here for 40 minutes.... I'm going to turn off the engines.... blah, blah, blah..." as my nightmare unfolded: We were going to be held against our will in this asphyxiating claustrophobic hell-tube some people call an airplane for 745 hours!

We've all read the headlines... toilets overflowing, the Cheez-It supply quickly exhausted, the overwhelming stench of body odor, and the captain defying all logic by not going back to the gate where upon passengers could disembark, breathe fresh air, and hug their loved ones once again.

In the end, this trip's traumatic tarmac torture timely terminated after the promised 40 minutes... and the Cheez-It supply remained intact. We'd been grazed by a travel bullet.


AUTHOR'S DIVERSION: During research for this TourAlong, I learned that men can buy Cheez-It boxers and women can buy A-line Cheez-It dresses! Go ahead! Click the links to order your boxers and dresses! 

Just in time for Christmas! Such Fun!

The images above are subliminal. You didn't see them. You're welcome... Your friends at Cheez-It!


And off we go!

Wait a minute! As we flew west a layer of cloud appeared. WHAT? Clouds over Seattle? The weather forecast had consistently predicted a 20% chance of rain. But that meant an 80% chance of the bluest skies you've ever seen in Seattle, right?

No... It meant there was a 100% chance of solid gray skies. At least it wasn't raining!

The light rail from SEA-TAC to Capitol Hill Station costs just $3.00 per person and takes 45 minutes. This is a MUCH better value than a taxi ride, or almost any kind of ride for that matter... even a purge-inducing carnival ride! Have I ever told you the story about the Bloomin' Onion that came back up after a particularly twirly ride? Maybe another time...

After joining up with Simon, we gathered for a midafternoon linner and ice cream with the rest of the Seattle Chavez Clan—Marc, Anne, and Diana. Actually, they live in Ballard—the home of many craft breweries, coffee shops, Pilates studios, tattooed hipsters, and some crazy people... like the guy wearing short shorts riding a bike shouting an obscenity-laden stream of consciousness at the nearest person or car. Downtown Ballard is a fun place to chill... but we had other plans....



Hey! Are you ready for the concert? It's time for Death Cab for Cutie!

Since 1997, Death Cab's been a driving force of Indie Rock; their music is as relevant today. Seeing this band in front of a hometown audience was going to be cool.

And off we go!

The forty minute Uber ride to Marymoor Park in Redmond passed quickly, largely due to the uber conversation courtesy of our uber Uber driver, Brian. Though I'm a relatively new Uber rider, I've had uber luck with Uber drivers. Uber!

Marymoor Park, King County's oldest and most popular park, hosts more than 3 million visitors annually and stages a summer concert series in its outdoor amphitheater. And, being the smart shoppers we are, we purchased chair seating for optimum comfort and viewing.

Safely settled into our chairs. Do you like how I make my chin the largest object in my selfies? Skillz! 

The opening band—Car Seat Headrest—was a treat! Originally from Virginia, this four-piece indie band now calls Seattle home. At the top of their set, we headed for the beer and wine tent where we decided $45.45 was an undeniable value for two wines and two beers. Yep! We really ARE smart shoppers! 

At $45.45, and served in the finest plastic cups, these tasted VERY good.

Remember two paragraphs ago when I mentioned purchasing chair seating? It really IS the way to go... sitting in a civilized manner, calmly watching the show. This is how rock music's composers intend audiences to experience the tapestry of angelic harmonics for which the genre is known.

And so it was. Everyone sat politely during Car Seat Headrest's 40-minute set.

As Death Cab took the stage, almost everyone who SPENT EXTRA MONEY FOR CHAIRS suddenly decided that standing up would be a really good idea!

And here's the dilemma: If you also don't stand up, the sound is muffled. And not only that, the view of the band and the synchronized light show is replaced by a view of at least one, if not two or three butts! And sadly, these are typically not Olympic athlete-toned butts!

It's not quite an image of butts, but it's awfully close, and I think you get the idea.

An artist's conception of a Death Cab for Cutie Concert without obstructions.

In the end, we stood up. Inevitably, and regardless of your height, a taller
person will always be standing directly in front of you.

The problem of height differential is easily overcome by simply shifting to the left or right a few inches to gain a new view between heads... unless you're behind a "swayer." Eyes soon fatigue as they try to focus on the distant stage while continuously being thwarted by the swayer's unpredictable motion. Don't believe me? Click the video below to experience just 15 seconds of this nausea-inducing phenomenon.

                                      

Despite butts and swayers, Death Cab sounded AMAZINGLY AWESOME!

But remember when I mentioned the weather?

As gray as the skies were, the rain had held off; through Death Cab's fourth tune there hadn't been a drop. But there was a distant flicker of light... and then another... and then...

Before the fifth song could begin, Death Cab's Ben Gibbard told everyone lightning was within eight miles and they had to leave the stage. Ben's announcement was followed by the stage manager asking everyone to go calmly to their cars for shelter, assuring us the show would resume in 30 minutes if all went well.

And off we went!

Car-less, and with rain beginning to fall, we found "The Barn," where park staff was discussing the turn of events. Within minutes the concert was officially cancelled... and a good thing too. 15 minutes into the storm the pitter patter became a torrent accompanied by a flash and an incredibly loud "CRACK!" Lightning had struck the stage canopy.

See the lightning bolt icon just below the word Redmond? That's us!

This storm was unusual for the Seattle area. In fact, an estimated 2,200 lightning strikes were recorded during the event. Not only was the concert cancelled, but the Washington State Huskies' game was delayed for two hours (and they ended up losing the game... Wha... Wha... Wha!). 

Caught on tape! Natalie and Simon react to the concert cancellation announcement...Wha... Wha... Wha!

Sensing that our evening outdoors had come to an abrupt end, Anne called, volunteering to pick us up. Meanwhile, Natalie, at the ready, whipped out a deck of playing cards for a few hands of gin rummy with our new friend Bob, one of the event staff! A deck of cards? Doesn't every hip rock concert attendee pack playing cards? I admit, it was a great way to pass the time. But did you know Natalie tried to smuggle knitting needles into a Sting concert? The confused security detail made us take them back to the car. Nope... I'm not making this up!

There was nothing more to be done than retreat to Simon's apartment...

Warm and dry, and with popcorn and scotch in hand, we did the only thing reasonable people would do: Watch Death Cab for Cutie videos! And so the evening played out...

The journey home began at 6:00 a.m., retracing our route via the light rail, the chaos called SEA-TAC, and the tranquil Boise airport. By 1:00 p.m. we rolled into our garage.

So there you go!

An electrifying 30-hour whirlwind TourAlong is memorable precisely because of a storm!

Ciao! ~ Todd


And now, a brief postscript...

Outdoor performances are "rain or shine" events; you buy your tickets and hope for the best. By the time we rolled into our garage, Death Cab had announced they would refund all tickets. Keep in mind that staging an event comes with substantial sunk costs... and these guys took it upon themselves to absorb those costs. They didn't have to do that, but they did.

Shout out a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T for Death Cab!



This blog is subliminal. You didn't read it. You're welcome... Your friends at Cheez-It!

__________________________________________________

Like the TourAlongWithTodd blog and want to keep up to date? Here are three easy options!

• Email me at toddchavez4@gmail.com and I’ll add you to my distribution list or…
• Enter your email address in the Follow by Email box on the right at the top of this page and follow the simple verification process. This method delivers the blog directly to your inbox.
• If you have a Blogger account, add my blog to your Blogger Reading List

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